Life is a funny thing. Through days, weeks, months, and years of planning, nothing every really turns out like you expected. Picture this little girly girl about five years old sitting in front of the tv, watching what she thinking is the most exciting show that is on all year...The Miss America Pageant. There I was, a captured audience, enthralled in a world I so wanted to be a part of. From that day I knew I wanted to be Miss America, and every year for the next 10 or so, I thought I would be. So what did I do, I would wait all year and get so excited when the pageant would come on and I would sit there, watching, trying to stay awake to see who would win, hoping and praying that one day that would be me. And sure enough I had my time in the sun. Now I am not your traditional beauty queen. My career was short lived. First round, Miss Pre-teen NJ 4th runner up...yay!! I remember going to Nationals and being so unprepared. Oh and did I mention I forgot to take off my shark watch for the formal gown walk through...ahhh unbelievable. Well these girls had been working their entire lives to be here. I had only just begun. Now don't get me wrong, I knew the next year I would be on top of things and feel like I was meant to be there, and that is exactly how it went. I was Miss Pre-Teen New Jersey 1996. We travelled back to Florida for Nationals, where even though I didn't win, I came home a local celebrity. I was featured in parades, I spoke at school elementary classes about staying drug free and I loved every second of it. It was one of the best times of my young life, but it was the beginning of when everything changed. I was in eighth grade at the time, and didn't have a care in the world. I had more friends than I could imagine, always had a boyfriend and I somehow managed to having this hot body for a 13 year old. Oh those were the days, but that was the beginning and the end of my beauty queen days, so much for planning my future as Miss America.
Summer came and went and I started high school a different person. Let just say I managed to put on a bit of weight, which instantly changed my high school life. But how could it not, all of the superficial, fake friends of course wouldn't be there if I didn't fit into their perfect mold. So I spent the next four years, excelling in school, joining every club, even being Pres or VP of a few and I played a few sports my Freshman and Sophomore years. So what was all of this for, my ultimate plan of getting into NYU. My dream school, the only place I ever wanted to be. So the years past and I managed to finish 11th in my class, which I considered to be pretty impressive. I applied for early admission to NYU and waiting for the day I would hear from them. Now my parents weren't originally too fond of my plan of going to school in NYC, but they knew how difficult it was to get in, so at the end of the day they agreed that if I got in I could go. So I waited patiently for my letter to come, I sent in a few applications for other colleges (but only ones that were free). I didn't even consider other options, this was it. This was going to happen. I had planned and worked so hard for so long for this. So there it was my letter, and what did it say...Dear Ms. Sabino, We are delighted to welcome you to the Class of 2005. Holy shit!! I did it!! Everything that I had planned was coming true. I remember the day I received the letter, my mom cried, partly because she was so proud of me and the other part because she was so upset I would be going to school in NYC. But little did she or I know at the time, that this would be just another dream, another plan that wasn't going to happen. See come the end of the school year I received my financial aid letter, and lets just say it was a bit less than promising. Turns out by the end of four years I would owe over $100,000 in school loans. So my dad sits me down and asks me what I want to be, you know what did I want to do with my life. And basically my response was I wanted to be a mother. So of course he questioned why I would need to go to college for that. Clearly dad, so I could educate my children on the ways of the world. Well my parents weren't buying it, and that meant bye bye to NYU. So now what? I thought about not going to school and maybe waiting a year before finding somewhere I wanted to go. So that next week I went to school and ran into one of the guidance counselors (not mine, but I managed the baseball team for him in 7th and 8th grade) and he asked me where I was going to go to school next year. I explained the story of the money situation and how I wasn't going to go. He told me that he has known me too long and has seen everything I have accomplished and he wouldn't let me not go to school. So he asked me if I was interested in seeing a state school. I said why not. So the next week I headed down to Stockton, where I met the Dean of Admissions, who offered me a spot immediately. And how could I not accept? So, there I was getting ready to graduate, going somewhere I never planned to be.
Summer came and went and I started high school a different person. Let just say I managed to put on a bit of weight, which instantly changed my high school life. But how could it not, all of the superficial, fake friends of course wouldn't be there if I didn't fit into their perfect mold. So I spent the next four years, excelling in school, joining every club, even being Pres or VP of a few and I played a few sports my Freshman and Sophomore years. So what was all of this for, my ultimate plan of getting into NYU. My dream school, the only place I ever wanted to be. So the years past and I managed to finish 11th in my class, which I considered to be pretty impressive. I applied for early admission to NYU and waiting for the day I would hear from them. Now my parents weren't originally too fond of my plan of going to school in NYC, but they knew how difficult it was to get in, so at the end of the day they agreed that if I got in I could go. So I waited patiently for my letter to come, I sent in a few applications for other colleges (but only ones that were free). I didn't even consider other options, this was it. This was going to happen. I had planned and worked so hard for so long for this. So there it was my letter, and what did it say...Dear Ms. Sabino, We are delighted to welcome you to the Class of 2005. Holy shit!! I did it!! Everything that I had planned was coming true. I remember the day I received the letter, my mom cried, partly because she was so proud of me and the other part because she was so upset I would be going to school in NYC. But little did she or I know at the time, that this would be just another dream, another plan that wasn't going to happen. See come the end of the school year I received my financial aid letter, and lets just say it was a bit less than promising. Turns out by the end of four years I would owe over $100,000 in school loans. So my dad sits me down and asks me what I want to be, you know what did I want to do with my life. And basically my response was I wanted to be a mother. So of course he questioned why I would need to go to college for that. Clearly dad, so I could educate my children on the ways of the world. Well my parents weren't buying it, and that meant bye bye to NYU. So now what? I thought about not going to school and maybe waiting a year before finding somewhere I wanted to go. So that next week I went to school and ran into one of the guidance counselors (not mine, but I managed the baseball team for him in 7th and 8th grade) and he asked me where I was going to go to school next year. I explained the story of the money situation and how I wasn't going to go. He told me that he has known me too long and has seen everything I have accomplished and he wouldn't let me not go to school. So he asked me if I was interested in seeing a state school. I said why not. So the next week I headed down to Stockton, where I met the Dean of Admissions, who offered me a spot immediately. And how could I not accept? So, there I was getting ready to graduate, going somewhere I never planned to be.
I love it. You are going to get addicted to this whole blogging thing ... I can't wait to see what direction this goes in!
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